Saturday, April 7, 2012

Unanswered questions

For anyone who knows me, knows that I am 100% A-type. I'm learning that in these types of situations this isn't always a good thing.  t has been a week since my bestie told me she has breast cancer. Every spare minute I have has been spent researching. I want to be - need to be - as educated as possible through this. 

But with research comes questions. Most will be answered in due time as results come in from the onslaught of tests Dani has/will be going through. But it is a hurray up and wait thing. For someone who is A-type, this isn't a good thing as patience in this type of personality is limited (from Wikipedia "...time urgency and impatience, which causes irritation and exasperation usually described as being "short-fused"..."). What?! Who me???

Why did no one take her seriously?

How long has she had this?

Has it spread?

And then there are those questions that there will never be answers to. Yet these are the ones that keep me up at night. Those that make me question is life really fair and if it is, why does a thing like cancer exist?

The question that plagues me the most though is "why Danielle?" She eats well, works out and leads a pretty balanced life. But more so, she has a family. She has two beautiful, active boys who are 5 and 1 years old. She doesn't deserve this. Why could it not have been me rather than her. 

Why Dani of all people? She is a good person - my best friend - this isn't supposed to happen to us.

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