Saturday, January 25, 2014

Retail therapy: more expensive than a shrink

"My name is Sarah Robinson and I have a problem: I am a shopaholic."

Yes. It is true. I love to shop. I am the queen of sniffing out a deal. I will not pay full-price for anything. Here's the thing: my love of shopping is perpetuated 1,000,000,000,000 times when I am emotional.

How does this differ from anyone else who loves to shop? It probably doesn't. It's not like I need an intervention from Gail Vaz-Oxlade (although hubs may argue that). But I probably should have a sponsor - someone I can call when I feel the urge. Malls are my drug. Shopping for me fills a void. It is my emotional crutch.

Why am I writing about this? Because this morning I gathered everything I have bought since Maddie passed away on Friday, December 13 into a pile. And now I know why the credit card company was calling to see if my card had been stolen.

 
Don't worry - I can justify why I *needed* every single thing in this picture. I'll start on the left with the Kastle skis...even though I'm an Elan girl. 
 
The skis were a gift for my husband actually. See, that's how selfless I am...always thinking of others. By buying him these skis, I was also supporting a local (to Ottawa), family owned store, Kunstadt Sports. By supporting locally owned businesses you build strong communities by linking neighbours in a web of economic and social relationships. Again, selfless. As you may know, I love to ski. Hubs has been 3 times in his life. By having his own pair of epic planks, we can hit the slopes anytime we please. As we're all about safety in our DINKY family, I had to buy him a helmet as well. *Sidebar: he has yet to use strap on these bad boys.
 
Next. Every girl needs a little black dress in her closet. Or three. Or fourteen. But who's counting. Yes, I have purchased 3 black dresses in the last few weeks. And accessories. With the work that both hubs and I do, we go to a number of events in the city. As Ottawa is just a big town, you can NOT be seen in the same outfit. Oh no. That's a serious faux pas. *Sidebar: the black lace & leather pants and polka dot peplum shirt fit into this category. Or a hot date night.

Unless you're living under a rock or spending every waking moment playing Farmville, you'll know that most of Canada and the Northern USA has been in the depths of a polar vortex. There are a bunch of scientific words to explain this but I have no idea what they mean. In my words: it's fucken cold. The eight sweaters and long-sleeve shirts were purchased to keep this princess warm. *Sidebar: the ones with the tags on them still are just on stand-by for when our furnace breaks and the world runs out of natural gas to heat our house.

Three pairs of boyfriend jeans? Cause they're boyfriend jeans. And I'm hip like that. *Sidebar: I'm going to look ├╝ber cool when it warms up 55 degrees.

Looking for a fun, exhilarating activity? Go to an auction. That's where I found these old leather tube skates and vintage snow shoes. To show my Canadian spirit at Christmas time, you'll find these wrapped in ribbon set against pine and cedar boughs at my front door next year. *Sidebar: these items will be worth at least $100 twenty years from now so I'll be MAKING money from this purchase.

Those are prescription glasses. A girl needs ta see ya know! *Sidebar: my benefits covered a portion of the four pairs and I got paid just after purchasing them so I considered that purchase a wash.

What's with the piece of paper you ask? Oh, those are just the e-tickets to the trip to Cuba I booked. What??? Doctors say it's important to get vitamin D to help maintain a healthy immune system so I'm just following their orders. *Sidebar: I bought my own snorkel set so others at the resort have a chance to use that equipment. Again, selfless purchase. Oh, and I needed to look cute while on hub's arm so the 3 skirts are for him.

Maybe I should have booked that appointment with my shrink to help me through the grieving process. Dammit!

Disclaimer: I did not receive any compensation for this post, however, if any of the following retailers would like to reimburse me, it would be ill-mannered of me to say no: The Bay, Costco, The Gap, Iberostar Hotel & Resorts, Kunstadt Sports, MacLean Auctions, Transat Holidays,  Le Veelage (aka Value Village), Zara.

8 comments:

  1. You know - I'm much cheaper than a therapist - you just call me and I'll talk to down ;). *HUGS* to you - <3 ya :)

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  2. My name is Loukia and I am the President of the Shopaholics Club! ;)

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    1. Are you currently recruiting for a Vice-President?

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  3. You are single handedly trying to keep this economy going. We should give you a metal not a straightjacket.

    Besos, Sarah
    Blogger at Journeys of The Zoo

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    1. Ya...I try. I'm all about giving back ;) Can the medal be plastic with a magnetic stripe on one side and when swiped through a machine buys me pretty things?? ooo

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  4. Vitamin D...nice one! I've been feeling guilty about the cost of our upcoming trip to Jamaica...I never thought about how it really is meeting my medical/health needs in that way as well! I'll keep that line at the ready...

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    1. Kate - you need a justification for any retail purchase, no matter how big or small, you just come tap on this girl's shoulder. I'll give you a reason why you *needed* it. I got your back sista!

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