It hasn't quite been 4 weeks so those unthinkable words were uttered. And it feels like Dani has been in a doctor's office or hospital every day since then.
There are so many tests that need to be run. CT scans. MRI. Biopsies. Blood work. Bone scan. It feels like it is never ending ... and I'm just in the passenger seat.
I don't know how she is doing it - everything has been handled with the same sense of humour and positivity than pre-March 21. This is where Dani and I differ. I'm the serious one. While she is handing out zingers and one-liners, I'm still trying to come up with a come-back to the one she gave me yesterday.
I feel like I should be doing more but don't know what that "more" is. As news start to travel of her diagnosis - remember, we come from a small town so it spreads like wildfire - more and more people are in-touch. As they should be.
Knowing how many people she has to respond to, I don't want to add more pressure by texting or calling all of the time. I let her know this so she doesn't feel like I'm withdrawing. It comes with mixed emotions for me though - on one hand I want to be there 24/7 incase she needs anything yet here I am telling her I'm not going to pester her.
This is one of the most confusing rides I have ever been on - as a passenger or not. Where the hell is the handbook for this???
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